Happy Wednesday, my friends! 2 days to Christmas. For the first time in a long time (maybe ever), I had all my shopping done before my wife’s birthday (the 21st). Good luck to all the other late-shoppers out there. 🎅🏻🤙🏻
These “4 the Fam” midweek emails a short, reflective, & actionable — structured to encourage you to press on to the end of the week in the leadership of your family.
1 Principle
What does every good company, every school, every non-profit have in common? They all have a set of values.
Values are the shared beliefs of a group of people that act as the compass for who they are and where they are going.
You could say that they are the characteristics set by the leaders that define the boundaries, the direction, the operating system of how they’ll get to where they’re going.
If all good organizations have explicit values, shouldn’t your family? It’s the most important organization you’re a part of and get to lead.
If someone were to ask you, your spouse, and/or your kids what your family values are, what would they say?
If your family doesn’t have values, perhaps you may be drifting in some way.
1 Practice
At your next family meal, ask everyone at the table to think & agree collectively:
"If our family was a business or a sports team (a group of people who work and play together), what is the one word that describes how we treat each other?"
1 Prompt
Fast forward 20 years — the end of 2045! Your grown kids are all together around a table describing their childhood to a newcomer.
What are the three 'unwritten rules' or traits they would say defined your home? [Are those the traits you are intentionally building and talking about today?]
1 Passage
"…write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates." — Deuteronomy 6:9
Turn this into a prayer for your family leadership this week:
Father — write your truth the heart of my family. Let our family values be more than just talk, but the compass by which we live. Help us to love others with intention today, so that anyone who walks through our doors can see and feel your presence and know what we stand for. Amen.
By the way…
If you need help organizing some main areas of family life — please check out The 7-Day Family Reset! You can do that here.
It’s a free email course that walks you through simplifying 1 area of your family life each day for 1 week.
(There’s also a day about creating family values!)
If you missed my Weekend Newsletter two weekends ago, I wrote about “a transformative year-end review”, with a list of questions that have been helpful for me to look back at 2025 and look ahead to 2026.
If you think anything here would be helpful to talk through with your spouse or you want to encourage a friend, family member, coworker — please forward it along!
Merry Christmas! And love to you all. 🤟🏻
